Thursday, April 11, 2013

And Peace Be With You


Nuns are kind of a dying breed. In the last 50 years, the number of Catholic nuns in the United States has decreased by about 70%. It's probably because, overall, they are f-ing terrifying.

I was raised Catholic and went to a Catholic elementary school. There were still a few nuns who taught some classes there, and I had one of them for first grade. She was about a hundred years old and either forgot or ignored the professional and legal shift toward not abusing students.

One time she made one of my classmates sit at the back of the class wearing a dunce cap. She also pulled my friend's pigtails in an effort to teach her a lesson about penmanship. And like cranky old nuns the world over, she busted out the ruler from time to time, sharp side down of course. It was more like boot camp than first grade.

But luckily, my generation came in at the tail end of the light version of Catholic violence (as long as you don't count the sex stuff). I mean, we didn't have to deal with anything like the Crusades, or the Inquisitions, or the Thirty Year War, or the European witch hunts.

Now that I think about it, I guess I can see what old people mean; kids today are kind of pussies.



P.S. Catholicism, don't take this the wrong way, but sometimes, from certain angles, you come across as a little... harsh. Maybe work on softening the edges a little?


2 comments:

Jen Randall said...

"Holy" shit Marie, that is funny! Oh, and also with you.

Marie Muenchow said...

Ha! Nice word play.
Thanks, Jen!